Marshall and I had a few great days together, but he was impossible to get a hold of and he was still in a relationship with his Rebound Girl, so we didn't see each other much.
In the meantime I decided to date and try to have fun, get him off my mind.
Around the same time, I acquired a job at the JC Penney call center. It was basically my first job so I was incredibly nervous, but I ended up enjoying the work and making some money, so it worked out just fine.
There was this boy in my training group... For some reason I found him incredibly sexy, but he didn't talk much. Being shy myself, I didn't have a clue how to talk to him, but over time I got to know him and his friends. His name was Gage, he sat by me whenever possible, and I started dropping hints that I wanted him to ask me out. One night he finally asked me to hang out with him, I think it might have even been Halloween, and I started seeing him regularly. He was a bad-boy type, very I-don't-need-you-or-anyone-else, and I was hooked. It wasn't what I felt for Marshall; it was pure attraction. My friends and I started spending a lot of time with him and his friends, and we were having the time of our lives. They were a couple years younger than us, but a lot of fun. And did I mention cute? Cause damn.
I've made this mistake several times in my life. I seem to be destined to repeat history every few years by falling into lust with a bad-boy who's just not that into me, practically begging for them to hit it and quit it. I probably knew, but refused to acknowledge at the time, that he was that type. The first night we went on a "legitimate" date I ended up in his bed. Afterward as I lie in his arms, I whispered that I was getting attached to him. He didn't say anything at all.
A few minutes later he told me I should probably get home before my parents started to worry. The next time I saw him he was over it. I overheard his friend say something about how he "got" me, something about all the other one-night-stands he'd had. I went home and never said another word to him. He didn't mind my silent treatment a bit.
I was absolutely crushed. I wasn't in love with him, it was nothing like that, but I was humiliated. I'd completely chased him, he was never into me at all. That's when I learned that guys need something to chase. Something that's handed to them is never going to be interesting enough. Men need a challenge or they'll get bored, and you'll get crushed.
I'd love to say I put that lesson into play from that moment on, but some of us are slow learners. I still haven't mastered the art of playing "hard to get". I'm just not a game player, I guess.
My punishment for refusing to play the game has been a lot of scars.
In the meantime I decided to date and try to have fun, get him off my mind.
Around the same time, I acquired a job at the JC Penney call center. It was basically my first job so I was incredibly nervous, but I ended up enjoying the work and making some money, so it worked out just fine.
There was this boy in my training group... For some reason I found him incredibly sexy, but he didn't talk much. Being shy myself, I didn't have a clue how to talk to him, but over time I got to know him and his friends. His name was Gage, he sat by me whenever possible, and I started dropping hints that I wanted him to ask me out. One night he finally asked me to hang out with him, I think it might have even been Halloween, and I started seeing him regularly. He was a bad-boy type, very I-don't-need-you-or-anyone-else, and I was hooked. It wasn't what I felt for Marshall; it was pure attraction. My friends and I started spending a lot of time with him and his friends, and we were having the time of our lives. They were a couple years younger than us, but a lot of fun. And did I mention cute? Cause damn.
I've made this mistake several times in my life. I seem to be destined to repeat history every few years by falling into lust with a bad-boy who's just not that into me, practically begging for them to hit it and quit it. I probably knew, but refused to acknowledge at the time, that he was that type. The first night we went on a "legitimate" date I ended up in his bed. Afterward as I lie in his arms, I whispered that I was getting attached to him. He didn't say anything at all.
A few minutes later he told me I should probably get home before my parents started to worry. The next time I saw him he was over it. I overheard his friend say something about how he "got" me, something about all the other one-night-stands he'd had. I went home and never said another word to him. He didn't mind my silent treatment a bit.
I was absolutely crushed. I wasn't in love with him, it was nothing like that, but I was humiliated. I'd completely chased him, he was never into me at all. That's when I learned that guys need something to chase. Something that's handed to them is never going to be interesting enough. Men need a challenge or they'll get bored, and you'll get crushed.
I'd love to say I put that lesson into play from that moment on, but some of us are slow learners. I still haven't mastered the art of playing "hard to get". I'm just not a game player, I guess.
My punishment for refusing to play the game has been a lot of scars.
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